Murder and Math

I will never be without a seat at Starbucks again. My crazy-vibe has spread. 

The public looked, and they said, “Oh, Lord, don’t let me sit next to that woman. She’s bat-shit crazy.”

See, this is a good thing. Two things are essential to being a writer (at least, for me). Caffeine and power. In that order. My laptop can run for several hours on a battery. I can’t last that long without coffee.

So, when we sit down at Starbucks, my writing partner and I always ask, “So, who do we kill today?” in a very enthusiastic tone. Slightly unfocused eyes and a bit of lip-smacking may be involved.

People tend to back away. Slowly.

If for some reason that doesn’t work, tutoring math does. Most of the general public seems to be leery of equations that involve variables and lots of other interesting things.

Using these two techniques allowed me to get a good week of work in. Planning is going well, and I’ve done some effective editing. 

I’m going to go back out now and torture the mundanes.

God willing and the Creek don’t rise, I’ll see you on Wednesday!


10 thoughts on “Murder and Math

  1. LOL, I love your technique. Maybe I should try it out someday… though I have no writing partner to ask. Asking myself who to kill today might work just as well as asking a partner, but it also might get me in more trouble. Hmm.

    • Ah, but Nicole, with a little bit of muttering under your breath, and some flexing of your fingers before you get down to to work, you might prime the pump a bit. Add a maniacal grin, flash a glance to the side at a potentially horrified customer, and you might have a vacant seat. Quickly.

  2. Pingback: Liebester Blog Award | regimcclain

  3. I did something like this a NaNoWriMo or two back. Not Startbucks, but Panera’s close enough… Oh, and no writing partner. But I have no doubt that half the clientele were convinced I’d missed my meds for too long (I was half-whispering/muttering character lines and proofreading pieces out loud) . As you say, add in a few gestures and…

    Well, not too many. We don’t need them calling in the truck with the nice men in clean white coats. A good course of action is to make sure the manager and a few servers know you’re a writer. Then they can reassure the super fearful. 😀

    • Absolutely, Eden, that’s why I’m so loyal to my local Starbucks. They know us…and feed us caffeine at regular intervals. They’re so kind. And they’ve got MANY more plugs than our local Panera.

      • Lucky! Our Panera and Starbucks are about equal for plugs, but not so equal on seating… especially comfy seating. But the regular caffeine infusions at either place are … well, awesome. 😀

  4. Okay, Eden, it’s just spooky – I finished posting my response to your comment, went back into my email, and found a message from Panera asking me to create an ode to my favorite Panera item. Hmm…I’m trying to remember if I have any dead friends/relatives who are particularly fond of bread…

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